seat belt extender

9/20/2010 – Seattle to San Jose

Early morning flight to San Jose and it’s packed.  I’m an aisle guy, always have been, but on this particular flight I was stuck with a window seat.  After settling in I could see the guy that would undoubtedly be in the middle seat next to me.  I’m not clairvoyant or psychic or vegan or anything like that, but it was one of those moments when I just knew it would be my luck to have this very large gentleman squishing me in to the window for the next two hours of my life.  Sure enough.   Now I didn’t even realize they made such a thing, but as soon as Charles sat down he rang for the stewardess for a seat belt extender.  It should be noted I have no idea what “Charles” real name was, but to protect the innocent sir largeness will henceforth be known as Charles.  Here is an excerpt of our conversation:

Me:  “Should you be traveling in your condition?”

Charles:  “What?”

Me:  “Should you be traveling in your condition?”

Charles:  “What condition is that?”

Me:  “I didn’t think you could travel while in your third trimester.”

Charles:  “Third trimester of what?”

Me:  “Third trimester of having a food baby.”

Charles:  “Don’t talk to me for the rest of the flight.”

Me:  “Okay.”

Sometime later after the stewardess had made her rounds with drinks and peanuts…

Me:  “Are you going to eat your peanuts?”

Charles:  “Yes.”

Me:  “Okay.”